Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize