Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
