okay pat passed out under dana's car
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
