He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
