nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
At least make sure they are 18
Why
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Randomize
