If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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