I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize