Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize