i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
