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My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
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