weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
i just had sex bonerless
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize