She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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