That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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