Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
