wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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