He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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