I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Randomize
