...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
