Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
Randomize