so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
i just had sex bonerless
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
