Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
