I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
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