Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
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