Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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