I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize