Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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