Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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