What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Randomize
