where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
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