the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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