Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Randomize
