She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Randomize
