I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out