i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
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