i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
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I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize