There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
