Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize