A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
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He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize