HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
