Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
