I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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