So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
barbara walters just said penis...
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
