IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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