Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
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there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
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On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night