I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.