Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time