first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Girls should come with a carfax report
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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