she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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