you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
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