It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
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She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
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Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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