she looked like the bat from fern gully.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
