I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
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I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize